Real Conversation

The following took place last night:

Older guy on the softball team: Why is it that every young girl smokes?
::Group of girls who, naturally, are smoking approach::
Older guy: See, that's my point.
Me: I can tell you exactly why. It's because I will never ever ever date a girl who smokes. Ever.


Yes, the world revolves around me, but only insomuch as it wants to screw me over whenever possible. Isn't that an odd combination of extreme arrogance and total paranoia? I'm awesome.